Many companies are getting Hadoopy often with little or no consideration of security because Big Data is on their list of cool projects. Have they opened the door to compromise? Better predictions and more intelligent decisions are expected from our biggest data sets, yet can we really trust the systems we secure the least? And is anyone ready to face why our best "learning" machines continue to make amusing and sometimes tragic mistakes? Infosec is in this game but Big Data is moving at a pace faster than our controls are being considered. What have we done about emerging vulnerabilities and threats to Hadoop as it leaves many of our traditional data paradigms behind? This presentation, based on the new book "Realities of Big Data Security" takes the audience through seven simple ways to deal with serious risks and elephantine security challenges here today.